Triggers...

Similar to 1997 when Princess Diana died, the recent death of Queen Elizabeth 11 seems to have sparked an outpouring of grief and sadness amongst many people. For the most part it seems to be those who are caught in the queues and then enter to see the queen lying in state. The sadness appears to be contagious!

This is natural and I remember 25 years ago, it felt like a wave, or blanket of grief covering the nation and there was almost no way of getting out of the way or not being impacted in some way.

For me this death feels a little different. Whilst the wave has appeared again, gathering momentum with each passing day and it is very sad she has died, the fact that she had reached the prime of her life, had been slowing down and retreating from certain duties over the past years, would have been missing her late husband terribly after his death last year and this was more or less expected within the coming years, all things combined (and many others) make it a different death to Diana.

What is similar is listening to and seeing so many people very tearfully expressing how it’s brought back and provoked memories of loved ones who have died either recently or some time ago. A grandmother who was a royalist, a mother who recently passed etc. Similarly the media has been reporting how walking behind the carriage of the Queen brought back solemn memories for William & Harry.

The point being is that anything, at any time and in any way can ‘make us remember’ and trigger thoughts, either happy, positive, sad or terrifying. It can come from the repeated action of something, a smell, sound, taste or vision – all of our senses can pick up reminders that take us back or rouse emotions.

This is natural, this is grief and holds true when mourning someone close to us or perhaps, as in this case from a distance that can inflame a more personal loss.

If you’ve found new areas of grief have been awoken over the past week, talk to someone if you are able to, or seek help from bereavement counsellors, places of worship, pets or other sources that have proved helpful to you in the past.