Inherited beliefs...

Initially I was going to title this post, “When does an adolescent become an adult”?

As I began writing I noticed a theme coming through about challenging (inherited) beliefs.

I’ve been contemplating this and recently challenged my perspective a little and feel that for me the true turning point into adulthood is when we feel capable of challenging an inherited belief that we’ve held from the dawn of time.

This might be a sports team we support or a food we dislike. It could be a view you have about anything that was originally and largely formed by taking on board someone else’s thoughts at that time. I guess it could also be a view of yourself that you’ve carried since childhood as a result of how others made you feel.

Two quick examples, give some thought to why you dislike a certain food or how you got into supporting that team. Quite often these are inherited from our childhood. For example if one of my parents supported a certain football, baseball, basketball or other team, I might begin to show an allegiance too. Likewise if I noticed a parent never eating a certain vegetable or other food groups it might strongly influence my acceptance of that same food.

We are quick to challenge and redress a caregiver’s belief when we disagree with them (Why can’t I stay up late on a school night or eat that extra chocolate bar etc). However the other beliefs tend to stick around a bit more and we don’t often think of challenging them as much.

Similarly when it has a negative impact on our emotional wellbeing, such as never feeling good enough, being fearful of letting someone down, always needing to be the best or at least putting on an image of this!

I was thinking therefore, that the day I try something that goes against my original grain (i.e a food I have been avoiding forever or appreciate I don’t have to keep doing things to make you happy/love me) and make my own mind up for myself about it, this is for me the journey into adulthood and becoming more autonomous and maybe even confident.

What examples can you think of regarding inherited beliefs? One or two that you have challenged and others on the waiting list?